I can get it for you, whole soul

The hooded figure waited under the light of the waning moon, next to a wooden placard on a long metal pole off to one side of the town square. Its message was clear enough, rendered in a lazy hand with blue paint. Ye Meeting Pointe. The hooded figure looked to the clock tower. 12:07.

“Crap,” she said out loud to herself, playing with the left sleeve of her cloak. “This is the last time I trust Shelby to know what is going on.” She pulled her hood back in frustration, exposing a tangle of brown hair.

A fizzing pop was followed by a growing spark of blue flame that came to resemble a human form, tall and imposing, standing in dark red and purple robes before the girl with brown hair. “Dyna, daughter of Gweniere, you have summoned me. How may I be of service?”

“Wait, how do I know you have the appropriate power and influence? Shelby tells a lot of people a lot of things. This is potentially expensive, she said.”

“My child, I am one of the highest rated local deities, with over 3000 positive reviews from your brethren in this province alone. Here is my review that is most highly rated as useful to new customers.”

With an audible pop, A tired looking woman appeared next to the being made of blue flame. She said, “… your vegetables!” The woman looked up at the girl in alarm, and then at the flaming skull. She flinched, glazed over, and said rotely, “Ever since I asked Edgar the Blue Skull for help, I have been ever so grateful.” The skull nodded, and the woman popped again.

The flaming blue skull looked down. “Now, what is your wish?”

Dyna blinked. “Well, I have two very simple requests. First, I want my family’s farm to succeed. We have had a horrible drought for two years in a row. But, I know that the best way to make that happen is to want every farm in this valley to succeed. Is that not correct?”

The blue flaming skull wearing a crown nodded in agreement. “That is certainly an easier request to grant, my child.”

Dyna said, “And, as my second request, what do you say if I want Gerat to love me?”

The skull stared down for a moment. “Did Shelby say I could do that? I’m more of a weather control and chaos magic sort of fellow.”

“Okay, fine, just the first one.”

Edgar snapped his fingers and produced a contract. “Sign here. You might wish to prick a finger first.”

“And, why is that?”

“To end your family’s troubles with such certainty requires your immortal soul in return, of course.”

Dyna threw up her hands and started walking away. “Well, I guarantee that Shelby will not hear the end of this! I can’t believe that her go-to higher power is so quick to nickel and dime me!”

Blue flames died down. “Please! Wait! Perhaps we can work in a minor hexing of this Shelby person? Free of charge?” But, he was alone in the town square, not quite sure of where he was, actually.

“Man, I need to work on my Anja’s Cauldron profile.”


While saving the Reddit WritingPrompt [WP] Be not worried my child, I am one of the highest rated local deities, with over 3000 positive reviews in an open tab to remind me to respond, I see the exact text go by my Facebook feed as an image easy to trace to Instagram. Perhaps ultimate credit goes to @ciatradwife on the Ex-Twitter for a fun and open-ended idea? Ladies and Gentlemen, the modern Internet. I do like the multiple independent renderings of skulls.


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